Saturday, February 16, 2013

Meena's Thoughts.....

Here I am restarting my life, the one which came to a complete stand still on 27th February 2011 when my beloved mother bid farewell to this world after going through the severity of blood cancer.  Life once again came to a complete naught on 26 January 2013 when my dad all of a sudden decided  to join his better half in her heavenly abode after a brain hemorrhage when the entire Nation was celebrating its 66th Republic Day with all the high and might of military power of our great India.  

The drum beats were echoed on Rajpath while the pulse beats of my mentor, my protector, my dad were on high pitch reaching a blood pressure level of 280 degree.  His desperation, feeling of meaninglessness in life and the withdrawal symptoms were never understood by any of us, the four children he brought up through the thick and thin of life.  The occasional angriness came out from him due to frustration and helplessness has also been passed off by us as the routine upheavals only.    Finally now he is no more.  The hustle and bustle of mourners and relatives have ceased now.  The stoic silence creeping on the tree on shedding its leaves engulfs me, the forsaken bird.     

Where shall I offload the heaviness of my heart? With whom I shall be able to share my sorrows?  Questions and questions without any definite answers swirling in my head.  

At the end of a long battle of pros and cons in mind, I am at a logical point now, ready to try sharing my mind, my thoughts, imaginations and vent out my feelings through this DNipCare Blog.  

I would also like to contribute through my pen and thoughts for the ailing patients for whom the volunteers of DNipCare provide palliative home care.  I know my disadvantage in reaching to those suffering patients along with our volunteers, but let me understand their perils, their issues and be with them mentally, if not physically.

Hope some of you, if not all, who read these scribbling, will comment and encourage me because at this juncture I require your wishes and inspiration to get rid of my grief, engage in the world of alphabets, words and sentences; get back to life with full of bright colours and joy sans the thoughts about my two polio ridden legs. 

With a lot of love,

Meena K Paswan
Nangloi, Delhi